“Always refuse to be like the others. The more you become similar to the others the more you will be useless because there are already plenty of the others.”
The struggle to fit in is part of human nature. Who doesn’t want to feel like they belong? However fitting in is more glamorized in our minds than it should be. This quote, by playwright and novelist Mehmet Murat Ildan, reminds us that being like everybody else actually renders us useless. This makes complete sense. Being a replication of others–others’ likes, dislikes, ideas, manner of speech, style, etc.–means you have nothing new to bring to the table, i.e. the world. But the more you are who you are, the more your unique qualities can shine in the lives of those around you and beyond.
“Growth is painful. Change is painful. But nothing is as painful as staying stuck somewhere you don’t belong.”
What a shame it would be if a caterpillar decided to remain in its cocoon. Fortunately, nature runs its course and a metamorphosis occurs. The caterpillar eventually emerges as a butterfly–having no choice in the matter. We too are faced with the prospect of major change. But we typically do have a choice. However, that choice is often akin to remaining in a cocoon. As we read in this quote by Mandy Hale, growth and change can be painful. But without growth and change, we’re more likely to be stuck where we don’t belong–in our cocoon. Perhaps, never allowing ourselves to experience our own metamorphosis.
“You can make life very simple or very complicated. Some people try to be what others want them to be. Others try to be different just to stand out. In both cases, they are changing themselves to impress others. Neither of these paths has a heart. Just be true to yourself. It’s that simple.”
Whether you’re trying to be what others want you to be or you’re consciously trying to be different to stand out, you’re concerned with what other people think. This quote, by Mike Stutman, serves as a great reminder to reflect on the reason why you are who you are. If any part of your identity has to do with what people think, then there could be a part of you that’s not authentically you. Meanwhile, there could be a part of you missing that you haven’t yet discovered. Sadly, some people go through their whole life neither discovering nor living true to who they really are because they spend so…
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“Half the trouble in the world comes from people asking ‘What have I achieved?’ rather than ‘What have I enjoyed?’”
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”
“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
“I’m not going to continue knocking that old door that doesn’t open for me. I’m going to create my own door and walk through that.”
This quote comes from director, producer, and filmmaker Ava DuVernay. It reminds us that not all doors are meant for everyone to walk through. We’re not all meant to follow the same path because we all have different personalities, goals, strengths, and priorities. However we assume there’s a set path for everyone to follow. Therefore we find ourselves knocking on doors that may not be meant for us instead of creating our own. So remember, repeated rejections or seeking and remaining in situations that make us miserable could be signs we need to create our own door.
PositLive Music: “Try”
“Try” Written by: Colbie Caillat, Babyface, and Jason Reeves Released: June 9, 2014 This song was inspired by the pressures singer-songwriter, Colbie Caillat, faced in the music industry to be someone else (Source). It’s about not stripping away your identity to be someone you’re not in order to please others. In Caillat’s words, “[‘Try’] is about how us women feel like we need to change ourselves in so many different ways for people to accept us and like us” (Source). However, the core message is something anyone can relate to. We all sometimes feel like we need to change ourselves in different ways for people to like and accept us. And the…
“Understand: you are one of a kind. Your character traits are a kind of chemical mix that will never be repeated in history. There are ideas unique to you, a specific rhythm and perspective that are your strengths, not your weaknesses. You must not be afraid of your uniqueness.”
This quote, by the author Robert Greene, reminds us that we’re all unique, including our thoughts, ideas, and character traits. Moreover, our uniqueness doesn’t just apply to the current time but spans throughout history. Often we try to hide the things that make us stand out because society trains us to conform–to fit in. But “You must not be afraid of your uniqueness.” As stated in this quote, that is your strength. Taking things a step further, our uniqueness is a superpower we all possess. And we all have a choice to either use this superpower or cover it up.
“You have to be odd to be number one.”
This quote is by Theodor Seuss “Ted” Geisel, also known as Dr. Seuss. The quote goes beyond the fact that one is an odd number. It uses this simple fact to illustrate that being different, unique–or perhaps odd–is sometimes what it takes to be number one. It’s amazing what you can accomplish when you’re not worried people might find you odd. That worry alone has a way of limiting your possibilities and potential. Without it, you’ll realize a much greater freedom to take risks and perform at your best.
“Those who matter don’t mind and those who mind don’t matter.”
This quote, by Theodor Seuss Geisel (aka Dr. Seuss), is about being yourself and not being too preoccupied with what others think. Ultimately, the people who don’t mind your quirks and flaws–those who accept and appreciate you for who you are–are the ones who do matter. Meanwhile, there are those who mind every little thing–who are the most judgmental–unable to appreciate you for who you are no matter what you do. There is no point in allowing them to take any more space in your mind than they deserve.
“Loneliness is and always has been the central and inevitable experience of every man.”
If you’re experiencing less social interaction than you’re use to right now, the feeling of loneliness will inevitably start to creep in. It’s not a sign of weakness. It’s completely natural. In fact, it’s proof that you’re a completely normal human being with normal human emotions–including the emotion that occurs any time our interactions and connection with each other is limited. This quote, by Thomas Wolfe, is somewhat comforting with regard to loneliness. Although it doesn’t provide any guidance, it does reveal some fundamental truths about being lonely. First, it’s natural. Second, it’s inevitable to happen at some point in our lives. And third, we are not alone in feeling…
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“We must all suffer from one of two pains: the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. The difference is discipline weighs ounces while regret weighs tons.”
“If you’re reading this… Congratulations, you’re alive. If that’s not something to smile about, then I don’t know what is.”
“You never fail until you stop trying.”
Relationships: A Fundamental Part of Our Human Condition
A healthy mind, body, and soul are all critical to living life positively. But I’m afraid we’re missing another key component: Relationships. There are countless studies on how relationships can help us live longer, reduce feelings of anxiety and depression, help us deal with stress, and more. Relationships are what connects us as people. So, they are a fundamental part of our human condition. Therefore, having healthy relationships is fundamental to a healthy mind, body, and soul. That being said, I’m excited to introduce Relationships as a new section to our menu. Whether it’s your relationship with family, friends, or a romantic partner, relationships can either break us down or…
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“Dreams don’t have to just be dreams. You can make it a reality; if you just keep pushing and keep trying, then eventually you’ll reach your goal. And if that takes a few years, then that’s great, but if it takes 10 or 20, then that’s part of the process.”
“Getting over a painful experience is much like crossing monkey bars. You have to let go at some point in order to move forward.”
“If you want to fly, give up everything that weighs you down.”
